Just curious, but now that my DH and I have retired and moved away from his inlaws I have had time to think (maybe too much!) about how his side of the family treated me, especially since I was his third wife and I basically disengaged from SD from the time she was 13. I never was outwardly mean to her, nor did I ever express any animosity to her or his family, I was just aloof. Granted it probably didn't help matters that I never made a lot of effort with her, or her me.