Can't keep my eyes dry today...
How do i even begin my weekend...
Here it is in a nut shell...I'll try to make it a quick version...
Friday went shopping for cushions for our patio furniture. Of course SD16 came with us and talked to DH the whole time.
Sat was home all day went on road lesson for 1 hour (DH worked) came home and was with me and my son the remainder of day. I wen to sons soccer game she decided "daddy" will be home soon so I'm staying here.....I went to game and honestly didnt want to go back home but was having a dinner party so home we went..
Got home SD was beside DH (of course) having a great conversation. So i went into kitchen to put food in oven and told DH to follow so i could talk to him about his day. Well SD16 followed him and when I asked how was your day she butt in with her road lesson. DH started listening...Of course I got aggravated but just when I was about to explode with WTF door bell rang our first couple showed up...So I dropped it and moved on....Of course vented to my friend who knows me well and could tell something happened....So after a few glasses of wine i felt better and just continued the night...
We went outside to start a fire in our fireplace outside and she proceeded to come out with us. Now my son stayed insode because ahhh adult time...Her oh no!!! so a friend of mine told her why dont you go in and give the adults some time...She gave her the worse look and just ignored her....Finally after a while DH told her time to go in well she had a complete fit....
Are you kidding me?
This is ridiculous.
I cant believe your trying to get rid of me
how nice thanks alot...
Well DH went into the house and have no clue what was said because I didn't ask and didnt care all I know she didnt come back out...
Sunday...Put out patio furniture (would of been great for night before but DH worked so) sat and decided to enjoy day....Well right in the middle of a conversation SD16 came out sat with us and started talking about DH's sister and shes crying and grandmother has depression and aunt is upset and blah blah blah....all this an shes crying....Other things were said but I got to the point i just looked at DH and got up, DH says where you going, I said I cant deal with this anymore....I grabbed son 14 and went out.....
Whe I got home DH said feel better and continued talking to SD16....I am beside myself...This is not getting better this is getting worse. i can not even have a conversation with my husband without her there, talking, crying, issues, WTF!!!!! I am starting to think this is never going to change and to be totally honest is not even worth it.....I wanted to talk to DH about it but SD would not leave his side all weekend.....I back off all week, I have plenty to do but I WANT AT LEAST THE WEEKEND...
Oh to top it off Sat night went to bed pretty late DH and I were dipsy from drinking wanted some "alone time" and SD16, SIXTEEN, walked into our room at 1am and did not knock... :jawdrop: I was horrified.....needless to say I went to sleep....What did she need you may ask.....She asked where the lemonade i bought was.....LOOK IN THE FRIDGE!!!!!! REALLY.....HELP PLEASE!!!!!
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Comments
Does she lives with you and
Does she lives with you and DH full time or just over EOW?
US!!!! FULL TIME!!!!!!
US!!!! FULL TIME!!!!!!
What an attention seeker. Dh
What an attention seeker. Dh needs to see she is an attention whore.
get a lock on the bedroom
get a lock on the bedroom door pronto!
also she needs your dh to not allow her to interrupt you. have you specifically said "i am beginning to resent living with you and sd16 because she is ALWAYS interrupting us!" guys don't always understand why we storm out of a room.
if you've tried that i would make it a weekly date night or day. period.
how long has it been that you two have gone on a weekend get-a-way, just the two of you?
and also could you say to
and also could you say to sd17
"excuse me...i was speaking and when i'm finished you may talk"
if i said that i know dh would back me 100%
Oh gosh! I feel for you! I
Oh gosh! I feel for you! I cant stand it when the kids cannot let the adults/couple have any alone time or space to even catch up with each other!! My SS10 does this to us. I hardly am able to get a hug when hes around. I know it sucks!!
Men are dense when it comes
Men are dense when it comes to women. You have to spell things out for them. Have you explained to DH that you feel like you are not getting alone time with him? And then gone on to say why you arent gettin any time with him like before and how you would like to accomplish that? Set up a date night every fri. if you can - out of the house - so that you KNOW that at least once a week you get some alone time, sans his shadow. He needs to set boundaries for her, as obviously he is the only person who she seems to respect. You should tell dh taht you are going to start being vocal about boundaries with her, too, and tell him that you want him to back you up! Try to phrase it all so that you are not blaming SD, but rather helping her to become a more independent young woman }:)
i understand how you feel.
i understand how you feel. its a difficult situations HUGS
OMG, if that happened in my
OMG, if that happened in my house, it would be an absolute deal breaker for me. I can somewhat understand them being that way when they are in the cling-on years 8,9,10 etc. But a 16 year old? Yuck!
How long have you two been together?
I would just coldly stare her down and walk away everytime she tried butting into my conversation. Hopefully your DH will get the picture when every private conversation you two have is unfinished.......
Or just say everytime...."I'll just leave you two alone" and walk out of the room.
Gotta luv that adult spousal
Gotta luv that adult spousal status. But it's the PARENTS fault for not putting their children in their proper place!!!
My DH and I have been
My DH and I have been together for 5 years. Actually this weekend we are going away for the weekend. Leaving Friday morning comming home Sunday night.
SD has already said what time you going, when you comming back, make sure your phone is on...
I tried to get DH to shut off phone at least on Sat. But he wont do it!!!!
And once again, the problem
And once again, the problem is guilty daddykins who won't put precious poopsiekins mini-wife in her place.
Shut the phone off for him.
Shut the phone off for him. Or accidentally leave it at home, steal the battery, if it's a smart phone block the number for the weekend.
Or tell him you need alone time, if he answers any communication from her (at least Sat.) you will be taking your OWN vacation, alone, for a week, and may look at apartments while you're out. There is NO reason for her to be up his ass like that. When I was that age, I spent most of my time out with friends or in my room, save for maybe one weekend/week a month that we did family things or I had time with either Mom or Dad. I did not follow them around, nor did I WANT to be in their space all the time.
I'm really beginning to
I'm really beginning to resent SD16. I've started opening my mouth and saying stuff every single time she pulls this kind of shit. I'm sorry you are going through this. I think you have two options: 1. tell her off every single time and make her go away. 2. Leave
It sucks, I'm sorry.
16 and still following her
16 and still following her daddy around so close. Something wrong with that.
Most will lose interest being so close around 13.
Does she not have friends to hang out with?
My SD 13 who is fixing to be 14 has already said she wants to make her summer short with us because she does like spending time with us but before summer ends she would like to have a little bit of summer time with her friends before she goes back to school. That is just normal teenage stuff.
Where are the friends to this 16 year old?
Keep walking
Keep walking away...Eventually he gets the hint and she stops. Worked wonders for me, but I had to walk out of the room every time she entered. DH finally started to see it, when he was the one stuck in the room by himself with her. Even the boys got up and left the room every time she would start rambling....
My SS used to do this. I
My SS used to do this. I never minded. BUT only because he was only over EOWE. I totally get a part timer doing it, but not a full timer. Tell DH to put a stop to it.
My ss7 does the same thing.
My ss7 does the same thing. Its because they have not had boundries set. I'am the one that makes the boundries in our home. SS is not allowed to come in our bedroom without knocking EVER. At the start, when he was in training and he just open the door, I'd just tell him to shut it and knock. Now he always knocks even if he knows I'm just reading.
And we also have the problem with ss wanting to listen to everything that we say, and ss always butting end to add his two cents even if he had no idea what we are talking about.
As a child I was never aloud to do this. When the adults were sitting around talking the kids had to go play. So for that reason alone it drives me crazy. DH wa raised the he could be apart of the conversation.
Now if I'm talking to DH and ss tries to come in and I don't want him to I just tell him we're talking to go on. At first I think it ticked DH off, but after a while He got use to it. If its real private then we go to our room and such the door or out side. Thats usually a sing to ss not to bother us.
Sorry for the error in
Sorry for the error in spelling. LOL Dh was raised that he could be apart of the conversation. Thats usually a sign to ss to not bother us.
She needs constant
She needs constant attention...and if its not about her she will make it about her in every way.....And hanging with her friends...Ya there so sick of her hypochondriac self no one wants to hang with her.....One of her friends (and she has 2) tried last week to have her sleep over and she wouldnt go. The girl tried 3 times and she kept saying no i'm staying home with my dad.....WTF is that
#1 - get a lock on your door
#1 - get a lock on your door immediately. My BS used to just walk into our bedroom until my DH & I ripped him a new one. We got a lock and it's no longer a problem.
#2 - Kids & Skids alike should NOT be allowed to sit with adults when it's "adult time." PERIOD. Good for your friend for telling her to leave.
#3 - You're going to have to just get all up in her face about it. When it's YOUR time with your DH she needs to back the fuck off. And HE needs to back you up!
I'd be super pissed if I were you...
"One of her friends (and she
"One of her friends (and she has 2) tried last week to have her sleep over and she wouldnt go. The girl tried 3 times and she kept saying no i'm staying home with my dad.....WTF is that"
I think I threw up in my mouth a little bit after reading that. She would blow off her own friends so she could stay home with her dad, who she sees all the time????? This girl has some major attachment issues, and needs help.
Your DH has to know this isn't healthy, right?
NOPE!!!!! he says she needs
NOPE!!!!! he says she needs me because BM is a wack job...
So he stuck is *ick in the
So he stuck is *ick in the wrong person and now its YOUR problem. I think not. Its called consequences.
This is my first time ever
This is my first time ever blogging.I never thought I would be doing this.I'm glad I did.These kids have lost their f****ng minds.If my moms door was shut,even by herself growing up!I KNOCKED!WTF?And then shes gonna ask for lemonade?It's only so many places it could be.Unless you guyz keep it in the bathroom sometimes or in some other peculiar place.LOL