Annoying Phone Call........

My peace is invaded again!! I was already annoyed last night, it was a long day, and I was letting something get the better of me, then at 10:12 pm, when I was just getting settled down....BM calls! I'm like WTF...what could she possibly want now? DH is holding the phone, I could see he was debating on answering it, I said "no way , not tonite, not now!" So she leaves a message as she used to do in the past. We go to listen to it, and , she is calling me!?! She is drunk first off, her words were slurring, and running together. She was calling because my 14 year old SS apparently needs a job?? And she is mentioning names of people that I'm supposed to know, who have a lawn service, and may be able to give her the last name and help him out!????! Ummmm what? The names she rattled off are people I have no clue of, did not know any of them, or any "lawn service". And now he's "your SS"...that's a f- kin first. I believe this was a "bait" call, and I don't bite on hers anymore. Weather or not SS is needing a job, he is only 14 still, what kind of work does she think he'll get hired for?? AND.....she is getting my& my babies cut of the tax return and stim. $$ so she can spend that so calld"child support" $ on HER CHILD, OF THAT HE IS 100%, I was told a million times when I lived down there to stay away and go "Play" with my own kids...and that is what I fully intend to do. Of course now DH is worried about SS, and why he needs a job so bad......it's cause she is sick of having to spend $$ on him.....HELLO....god forbid those kids start costing Her anything! She better not call that cell phone again, or it's goin in the g-damnd ocean! The sound of that pathetic, drunk voice makes my skin crawl...and now this will be on DH's head for days!!!!!! I'm trying to be reasonable, despite this post and the way I sound right now, but I don't want her calling, especially for stupid crap like this. Yeah, like I'm going to help her, she must have been really lit last nite. If her son needs something, than she can get it for him, no matter what it is. I may just look into changing this cell #, but then SS would not know it, and there goes his contact w/ DH....cannot do that. I know that just ignoring the calls will just have to do, but I don't like the disruption it causes, or my DH's reaction to them. I'm glad he is ignoring them as well, but now this will be the topic of conversation for days, especially with the family, and that's gettin real old! What to do ????

Chel Bell's blog
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geez chel

just when yr life is peaceful and settled...BAM! can u get a restaining order against her, change yr number and just let SS call? i dont know but she shouldnt be allowed to call u like this...if the kids need to call fine...they are old enough now. but not her. how does DH feel? is he gonna call SS and find out whats going on?

re:

We have tried things like you suggested in the past, and as you see, no luck, we need to ignore her, If we change the # SS could have it, but then so will she.......everything we give or tell skids gets to her. So that would be useless, besides our cell # area code is still for the north shore area, and we want to keep it that way, so they do not know we moved. I don't think DH would be comfortable having his kids not be able to reach us at all, that phone is all they have left...now if she keeps this up, even after we ignore her, then thats another story.....we will need to do something drastic, but if we don't take the bait, it should work. She was drunk...and being a dumbass, that's all we can say. My DH , although tempted, is not going to call him, actually, I'm the one who is supposed to call him back, and , SS has a cell phone, but, I think I'll just ignore that to, and if he really needs to speak to me, HE can call for ME, and I'll talk to him , but from what his mother said she needed from me...I don't have any idea who the people are, or what she is talking about anyway, so there really is nothing to discuss.~ " I started out clean, now, I'm jaded"~ Rob Thomas, Matchbox 20

Chel, I am in a similiar

Chel, I am in a similiar boat as you. Psycho's calling and disrupting our lives. I have gotten some good advice on the post I did yesterday... about not being in the same room, not listening to their calls, and trying to not hear what is being said.

Perhaps this is something you and I can work on together. All I want is a peaceful life, like my other married friends whose DHs came free and clear of baggage.

re;

I would like to do that...believe me, but....that is just how some of the "train-wrecks" of the past started. That is why we no longer answer the phone anymore when it's them...they can leave messages, and if needed DH can call.....HIS KIDS.....back. I used to leave the room, not listen to calls, etc. but that's pretty hard to do when they are yelling and screaming at eachother......you see, DH and BM cannot talk...at all! So that is why my DH took it apon himself to take the "high-road" and just not talk at all. I have come to realize that "baggage" is forever You just have to decide what closet you can stuff it in, and what size lock to buy.~ " I started out clean, now, I'm jaded"~ Rob Thomas, Matchbox 20

Chel....

I hope you don't call her back. It doesn't sound like you will, but that would be a really bad idea. She is trying to bait you into a fight. Ignore her and don't feel guilty about not helping SS. I know how hard it is to ignore a psycho BM, I have one of those myself!!! However, it can be done. Try not to worry about whether or not they communicate with each other, just try to disengage. I know it is easier said than done, but maybe when she calls, you could go outside or for a drive???? Good Luck.

Your right robinson....

it's just a bait....she does not usually call us, the last time was months ago, and DH never called her back, 'cause there was nothing to say. I have no intention to call her, believe me , that is the last voice I need to hear, nor will I "call my SS back" like she asked. And from now on , if skids do happen to call DH, making myself "absent" is not a bad idea.~ " I started out clean, now, I'm jaded"~ Rob Thomas, Matchbox 20