I'm sorry I haven't posted much recently.  Its just been really busy - family weddings, some minor health issues (for DH) resulting in appointments etc.  

But - I do have updates directly related to my steplife.

In my prior blog I posted about a friend of Bratty's that was tragically murdered (at the young age of 25, with 2 young boys) last month.  I texted Bratty condolocences, and we had a nice exchange.

A couple of weeks ago, DH asked me if I would be open to him offering Bratty a visit to go to the funeral.  I said of course.  Then he said she had other friends who knew the deceased and may want to go if they had a place to stay, and would I be open to hosting more than Bratty.  I said, in this situation, sure, but nor more than 2 extra beyond Bratty (and I assumed Nutter).

Fast forward to this weekend - still no word on what was happening (which I understand, this family is so grieving, waiting for the remains back - the county prosecutor already said they were going for the death penalty given the brutality of the murder of this poor young mother) but Saturday (while we were in Miami for a wedding) DH said the funeral was now scheduled for Tuesday (today).  Bratty took him up on his offer for one overnight.  And said they might have a friend (not Nutter GF, who is curiously absent) with them.  OK, no prob.

Yesterday, DH texts Bratty, i.e. what time will you be here and will you have a friend  They said around 5 pm and they would have a friend (name withheld) who has been here before.  My forgetfel DH didn't remember this friend but I did - they are apparently deftly allergic to cats.  Hello, people, we have 2 cats.

I told DH this morning and he texted Bratty - who replied, oh sorry I forgot.  WTF.  We have had cats for almost 3 years now.  

I am p*ssed at Bratty.  I am p*ssed at DH.  Why do I HAVE TO BE THE ONLY ONE THAT REMEMBERS SHIT? 

And what would have happened if Bratty showed up here with her cat-allergic friend?  I had a mini meltdown this morning (actually not mini- I was crying and still am).  DH said well he would have sent them to a hotel.  Then I had visions of Thanksgiving 2018 when he yelled at me in front of Bratty (because she decided to articulate she wanted vegan food, right as I was pulling our non-vegan meal our of the oven).  Oh no. 

I told him I still don't trust he would support me in the moment, in our current situation.  He said he understood, and he would send them to a hotel if it came to it.

Its been so triggering for me, I've been crying in the bed for the last hour before this post.  As of yesterday (before this cat-allergic friend issue) I was sympathetic to Bratty's grief.  And was fine with her being here.  We were planning on ordering vegan and non-vegan sushi - then they were heading out tomorrow morning.

I'm pissed because I told DH I can't be the one always remembering/over-functioning on these 'visits' (first one since 2020 - pre-pandemic).  He said I didn't have to, and he would handle it.  But I flash back to getting yelled out in Thanksgiving 2018. I cant get over it and clearly don't trust either Bratty or DH to help me.  

Why did I agree to this?  I hate being such a sucker sometimes

Still crying and feeling so down....