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MIL just screwed up our relationship with BM

briarmommy's picture

Submitted by briarmommy on Thu, 10/27/2011 - 6:31pm

THere has been a lot of stuff going on with BM that I haven't been blogging about because it is just a cluster fu*k. But DH and I were dealing with it. MIL in typical overbearing behind our back fashion though just screwed it all up. We started slowly putting together a case for us to have custody we have been trying to get DH more involved with SS's teachers and doctors because he was lacking in that area, putting together facebook evidence, etc...we had a long term 1yr plan to go in for custody. Two weeks ago we had a hick up though because BM left the state without telling us and left SS with her felon brother she was gone a week and then stopped checking in with her family so they called DH, DH worried called for a wellness check, it turned out fine...Bm came back and we were moving foward with the previous plan since SS was unharmed. Bm found out about the sheriff coming to her house when she returned and called us we denied calling it and said it must have been the hospital when her brother went in for an accident while SS was is in his care(whole nother story), she bought it. Then today MIL decided to try to call SS's school and get imformation on SS....with no parental consent I might add.....Principal called BM because an outside party was trying to get information and now BM believes that MIL called the wellness check and refuses to deal with her......this is a problem because I don't have a car so MIL always did the half way meet friday nights.....now BM is going to drive SS all the way to my house while DH is at work and then on Sun. we have to drive him all the way back to BM's (an hour and a half drive one way) I told DH to check his mother, she even started to draw up custody paperwork for DH after he told her now is not the time(she is the head paral legal for the domestic relations judge in our county) Mil is obsessed with SS and wants him up here so that she can have more access(what she doesn't realize is that if we have custody she will see him less because now she gets him overnight everyother weekend that won't happen if he lives up here) Why does she have to stir the pot.....why? This is none of her business......I know she is lonely but I want this bitch out of my life......plus now I have to deal with BM every other friday all by myself.......I hate my Mil.

Comments

habsle's picture

Submitted by habsle on Thu, 10/27/2011 - 7:05pm

Are you talking about my MIL? She has done almost the same thing. MIL thinks she is the mother in my relationship with SS!

briarmommy's picture

Submitted by briarmommy on Thu, 10/27/2011 - 7:09pm

My DH and BM for the matter gave her to much power when SS was a baby and even later until there seperation when SS was not quite 2, they both were busy and let MIL take a lot of the power. They lived with her when they were together and then DH continued to live with her except for a 1yr period until we got together. So when they decided to be parents MIL didn't want to let go and now she resents BM and me for getting to be mothers to SS when she has no power or control now.

dreamingofhappiness's picture

Submitted by dreamingofhappiness on Thu, 10/27/2011 - 8:11pm

My MIL decides it is more important to be friends and have a MIL and DIL relationship instead of having that relationship with me... She (MIL)stands up for BM (EXDIL) about everything. She used to scream at HD for not being here. He was working as an OTR driver. trying to pay CS. So, Me baing married to my DH for the last 3 years and together with him for a total of 5 years... I am the one put on the back burner and ignored unless something is needed by her or another member of the IL family. Except for my SIL... She is great. Her and I view this entire family the same way....

briarmommy's picture

Submitted by briarmommy on Thu, 10/27/2011 - 8:52pm

Mil sides with BM when it suits her needs but thats not going to happen anymore because BM now hates her.

wonderland0819's picture

Submitted by wonderland0819 on Thu, 10/27/2011 - 8:36pm

My MIL thinks she is the skids parent. She thinks she should be involved in everything. Icluding our move accross country (military orders). She decided to follow us here without a place to live. So now I am stuck putting up with her daily in my home, with the whatever Alice says doesn't matter attitude, and the I should go with you guys to register the kids for school because I was a school nurse until I moved here so I know how to talk school (parents have been doing it without "talking school" for a long time.) She is a nightmare.

briarmommy's picture

Submitted by briarmommy on Thu, 10/27/2011 - 8:54pm

Thank God that will never happen to us, DH hates MIL as much as I do, I am so sorry you have to deal with that, you are a much better woman then I because I wouldn't let MIL live in our home even if she was ill(thats what retirement facilities are for)

wonderland0819's picture

Submitted by wonderland0819 on Fri, 10/28/2011 - 9:49am

It wasn't my choice. I was told it was happening after it was decided and plans were made without me. I tried to stick up for myself and say hell no, but i was told that H made this decision before I was ever in the picture, so I couldn't change it. Umm hello when you met me, you should have revisited things that would effect me or at least tell me about them so I could say no. I do all I can not to commit murder everyday.