Please keep the prayers coming-I have a job interview Monday and need all the help you
can send my way! I want this job, need this job so badly.
So that's the good news.
But of course H called this morning....to tell me the IRS has garnished 75% of his paycheck. And now I'm getting the oh, baby, I'm so sorry. Oh baby you don't deserve this. Oh baby are you going to divorce me. Oh baby, I got so upset over this I threw up this morning.
Jerk. that's all I can say right now. I am so furious. And he's making excuses for himself. And telling me that if he wasn't married he'd just move, so they couldn't find him. Like he's done for the past how many years....not filing tax returns so they couldn't find him.
And says he, I can understand if you divorce me. Like I'd tell him first. Yea, right. Like he told me he has never paid his taxes, like he told me he had 6 years of back taxes due on his house. He's an idiot.
So pray for me-to land this job. Then I can wash him out of my life, never to be seen again.
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oh good luck good luck good luck!!!!
What can you do to prepare? If nothing else, that helps me feel more confident to get all my ducks lined up...
"Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results." Albert Einstein
BW
My prayers are with you-DO NOT Give in to this shyster!! Whatever you do -DO NOT FEEL SORRY FOR HIM- Keep playing all the negative things he has said and done to you over and over again! How he has placed EVERTHING and EVERYONE over this marriage!
I pray you get this job and I wish I was a fly on the wall when you kick him to the curb!
Step Parenting – you might need to step back before you step in something!
I'm praying for you to get this job!
I want to be able to read that you've kicked the idiot to the curb. I'm sending good vibes your way.....
luck
Good Luck on the job. This is the perfect opportunity to tell him not to come home and to be on his way. Sounds like he is wanting you to give him permission anyway. If his name was on that house that you are living in the IRS would put a lien on it to get their money. They can also garnish his unemployment checks.
Tina Turner reference again...
Several people have referenced her (What's Love Got to Do With It", her autobiography, was on LifeTime last night, so maybe many of us watched it!! I sure did!), and BW, your situation is a major analogy of her life!!
Ike brutalized and mistreated Tina for YEARS....when she finally kicks his ass to the curb, he shows up with flowers, etc. then FINALLY falls completely to pieces while she THRIVED.
HE COULDN'T "LIVE", literally, WITHOUT HER.
THAT's when this "jerk" is gonna start being nice to you, BW, when you FINALLY HAVE HAD ENOUGH. You are THERE. You are READY TO MAKE THE MOVE, and he's shitting his drawers.
Good for him!
No one can make you feel inferior without your consent."-Eleanor Roosevelt
If I get this job, the day they hire me will be the day the lock
"To Thine Own Self Be True" William Shakesphere
will be the day the locks are changed on the door!. And I will file for divorce immediately.
I've already told him I've had it. I'm taking total control of all finances-I am no longer the only one to do without. I told him he WILL NOT eat out everyday (his employer is trying to get them 40 hrs/week-tho he filed unemployment for last week, he has 40 hrs this week). I told him the TEXTING is coming off of SD17s phone TODAY (she's the only one of the 4 of us who was granted that privelage).
Then I brought up how he REAMED me about the motel costs when Mom was in the hospital-after he had just spent $1,600 on himself. AND I'm not done. This guy better look out-all the rage I've been holding in is boiling out of me right now.
I pray for that job. I've never in my life wanted one so desperately (trying to calm myself so desperation does not show in the interview).
WHEN I get it, I plan on asking for 3 days notice...3 days to get the attorney, 3 days to get the locks changed, 3 days to get Mom home from the hospital, 3 days to get his worthless ass off of my insurance (auto), etc.
Then I'm going to let him know exactly what I think of him. And of his rotten SD17 (who, soon to be 18, has hopefully taken her last breath in this house).
What I can't get is how he tried to get me to sign to buy property in Texas last summer. Is he retarded? You don't buy more property when you havent paid taxes on the proerty you already have for 6 years! You don't buy property when you're guilty of tax evasion and know it!
He lives in fantasy land. We'll see how far he gets on his own!
How did
DH take your taking over the finances and his Cinderella princess losing her texting?
Step Parenting – you might need to step back before you step in something!
Can he sell the property??
I don't know how all of this works, but can he put it up for sale? He obviously does not have any use for it.
I'll be sending positive vibes your way!
"When you take charge of your life, there is no longer need to ask permission of other people or society at large. When you ask permission, you give someone veto power over your life." ~Geoffrey F. Abert
I had left this site but
I had left this site but still read it, and just had to comment because I read through your whole blog and you've just been treated horribly. Sometimes it seems like women on this site get too eager to tell others to leave their husbands, but in your case, I hope you get the job and divorce him because he has nothing for you, and if he lied about taxes, there could be other things you don't know about, and you shouldn't have to help him get through the consequences, especially after all he's done to you regarding his daughter. But please get rid of him abruptly so that he doesn't have time to plan anything against you or to steal from you.
H is so transparent; guess since I bought the lie about his
"To Thine Own Self Be True" William Shakesphere
finances being all cleared up before I married him, he thinks I'll buy anything.
Since this garnishment came (which leaves a whole $400.00 of his paycheck for us to live on for the next two weeks, never mind paying the bills), he's been acting totally different.
Agreed with me about SD17's behavior and addressing it.
Said the finances need to all be controlled by me.
Asked me to make a list of things he needs to get done here at the house when he's home.
Yea, he's running with his tail between his legs-because of the garnishment. He doesn't really give a damn what needs to be done here. He proved it-he was home for 5-yes 5 days last week, and the only thing he did besides play cards and visit him Mom was to fix SD17's car.
I know what he's doing-trying to kiss up so I don't kick his lazy behind out the door.
Too late. Once I land a job, he's gone. I haven't forgotten the insults, I haven't forgotten him throwing eggshells on the floor for me to clean up just because I put the waste basket back where it belonged in the first place, instead of where he wanted it. I haven't forgotten his announcement that SD17 is "off" when she's here and doesn't have to do a thing to help, like set the table, clean up, etc. She was to be served her meal like a queen, and then be cleaned up after.
I haven't forgotten him going off on me in front of a plane full of people when our plane hit a bump and a little coke (pop) got spilled on his jeans. I haven't forgotten him screaming at me for hours when my Mom was in the hospital over the cost of the motel room (they gave a hospital discount, btw). When he had just spent $1600 on things he "wanted".
I haven't forgotten that my son had to get a motel room Christmas nite, while his Mom and D's stayed here (tho D's live only 30 minutes away, and my son lived 5 hours away). I haven't forgotten doing all the Thanksgiving meal, and cleanup with my son, while he and his D's sat and played games.
I haven't forgotten being reamed over the $90.00 grocery bill, when he ate at a steakhouse nearly every nite of the week and I never eat out. I haven't forgotten the sheriff at the door with a summons for his unpaid plumbing bill from over 5 years ago. I haven't forgotten him and his ex deciding-with no even discussing it with me, that SD14 (then SD13) would live with me.
And most of all, I haven't forgotten the wedding nite. I haven't forgotten being yelled at and screamed at on our wedding nite, sleeping on the couch. And I know it's not because I'm some undesirable hag no man would want. My bff's ex bf has a huge crush on me, and according to her, is just waiting in the wings for me to get rid of H. Unfortunately, I now have no interest at all in ever being involved with another man. I just want my own life back.
Sorry so long. This is more of a reinforcement session for me, for how the last 10 months (the length of my marriage) to h have been.
I like the plan.
Witchster,
Hang in there. This to shall pass and you can move on with your life and constitutionally protected right to pursue happiness. Please don't give up on all of us guys yet. Not all of us are slathering simians and idiots. I have a friend that is not totally repulsive, is extremely intelligent, educated, professional and is really a good guy...... and he is financially stable and independent. No issues with his kids or XW's. His three oldest are 20+, on their own and great young adults and his 12yo lives with BM who is not the hag that many BM's appear to be. He and BM2 get along well, live ~2000 miles apart. His youngest is a good kid and visits periodically. My friend is probably one of the best Dad's I know. His home is always spotless. About the only down side I see with him is that his sense of humor is DRY and he is CHEAP, CHEAP, CHEAP!
Drop me a PM if you want his e-mail.
Of course if you chose to move your romantic inclinations to the fairer gender ...... take lots of pictures and share, share, share!
For some reason us guys like that visual!
JJOC.
Best regards,
Rags-you are hilarious!
"To Thine Own Self Be True" William Shakesphere
Sorry, but looking to the ladies for companionship just ain't in the cards for this cougar!
Your cheap cheap cheap buddy would be much more appealing-I'm kind of on the cheap side myself (of course, only cause I've had to be!).
How can he pay CS?
In WI they can only garnish wages for one thing at a time, to insure that you have some money to live on.
My H has CS taken directly out of his check from his employers, so we don't have to deal with it, so no one could garnish till SD is 18 (in 8 yrs).
I am shocked they can take 75%--holy smokes!
Good luck on the interview!