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Call Out the Coast Guard!!

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Submitted by Auteur on Mon, 02/27/2012 - 1:13pm

To rescue Brainiac (SS15) and Prince Hygiene (SS9)!!! They went canoeing on their Spring Break (a tip of the hat to VD, SD13, who made all Fs on her recent report card).

Seems that Brainiac and PH tipped the canoe over in the inland lagoon so they called out the rescue squad and had to wait for a whole hour!!! That's a VERY long time to go without Doritos in hand, but I digress.

Now mind you GG's kids are supposedly "athletic" so I'm not sure why a six foot tall young man and a five foot two inch tall nine year old couldn't flip back the canoe and climb inside.

Setting Stepmom's Perception Back a Hundred Years

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Submitted by Auteur on Thu, 02/23/2012 - 10:07am

http://news.yahoo.com/2-charged-death-ala-girl-forced-run-082216169.html

UGH UGH UGH UGH UGH UGH!!

Way to go SM for making it that much harder for the rest of us! Although I can't see ANY skid OBEYING their stepmom to empty a waste paper basket let alone run up and down the street for three hours. VD would have put her hands on her hips and said "screw you! at the suggestion that she walk a few extra steps to the bathroom and not pee outside.

Ever Wonder How Those Private "Talks" that Biodad has with his Progeny go?

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Submitted by Auteur on Thu, 02/16/2012 - 1:24pm

Here is an artist's rendering of how said *disciplinary* talks go:

Biodad: "Now (insert skid's name), I need to talk to you about something important.

Skid: (sing songy) "Yes, Dadddeeeeee?"

Biodad: "I trust you and believe you and I always want you to be able to come to me"

Skid: (bats eyelashes) "Of course Daddddeeeeee!"

Biodad: "SM tells me you. . ."

Skid: (interrupting) "That bitch is LYING! You KNOW she wants to break you and me up Dadddeeeeeee!"

Random Vent--POOOOOOOOORR BMs and their VACATIONS!!!

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Submitted by Auteur on Wed, 02/15/2012 - 8:27am

Yeah the Behemoth, Snuffy and the three skids (plus the two adoptees) are all flying off to Florida for the week! Must be nice!!! Yeah they are so deprived and missing daddykins (boo hoo) Yet everyone pities children of divorce nowadays??!! Wow when I was a true single parent and even when I remarried I could NEVER afford to go on holiday like the Behemoth clan does! GG's kids are having the time of their life!!! No need to have good grades, just keep failing everything and still you'll be treated like Kings and Queens!!

:sick: :sick:

Heh Heh Pre-Valentine's Day Boot on Snuffleupagus' Neck Alert!!

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Submitted by Auteur on Mon, 02/13/2012 - 2:19pm

And the obligatory FB post from the Snuffleupagus just before V day. "My beautiful wife (The Behemoth) is the BEST thing that has happened to me; I don't know what I did before she came along" (has to post this the day BEFORE Vday so the Behemoth will know it's not just an obligatory V day gesture--insert sound of whip cracking)

And all HIS relatives wrote in quipping that the Behemoth herself wrote this post!!

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