Meeting Lawyer on Monday
So I finally made the call. We are going to a lawyer on Monday to see what are options for me adopting SS. I am really nervous to be opening this can of worms. I have no idea what the outcome will be or how things will play out.
The alternative is do nothing at all and just hope that nothing ever happens to my DH.
Just nervous and scared about it all. Anyone have any tips for this process? Like I said we are meeting to better understand what our options are moving forward.
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Meet with the lawyer and
Meet with the lawyer and discuss it. I've researched it before (as a back up to get the girls away from Psycho IF we get a solid enough case to not lose custody over it... Schemantics...) Ordinarily a judge will like to see you married for a year just to be sure it's a good permenant environment for the child. But honestly with your BM being gone virtually the kid's whole life. I think you'll be a good canidate
Thank you! It is just so
Thank you! It is just so nerve raking because I have no clue if this will bring her back around or not. We have not been married for a year but we did buy our home together over a year ago and we are both on it so hopefully that will show something. I know this might be a long process and take time. Who knows.
Thanks for the support!
Good luck!! I told you before
Good luck!! I told you before that my stepdad adopted me when I was 7. It was the best thing that could have ever happened to me. I love that you are taking this step!
Thank you so much for the
Thank you so much for the support!
There's no way on god's green
There's no way on god's green earth I would willingly sign up to be legally responsible for children I didn't give birth to.
It would limit your exit options.
Glad not everyone feels the
Glad not everyone feels the way you do. I love my SS very much and I already view him as my son.
Good thing adoptions never
Good thing adoptions never happen, eh? All those NON related kids being given to adults and ruining their escape plans...what?!
At least OP is willing to raise the child...something the "bio mother" has not done most of the child's life. I really don't see how it's such a horrible thing? If "BM" really didn't want this to happen then perhaps she should ACTUALLY be a real parent to the child she gave birth to!
BM has to
Give her OK and sign away her rights . Guest you must try to find BM, and post in newspaper if that still done
They try and serve her, if
They try and serve her, if she can't be found, it does go to print. It has to run so many consecutive weeks (differs by state) IF she doesn't come forward within 30 days of the last newspaper running then she's considered served and adoption can go through.
However, based on anbandonment for 7 years, regardless of her response, judges often rule in the favor of the one trying to adopt for a chance at a more stable home for the child. The don't look favorably on parent sonly coming forward because they might lose the kid they think is on retainer.
But all this doesn't gurantee, however with her situation, I think she has as good a shot as she can.
She will be served we have a
She will be served we have a vague idea where she is. Not the actual physical address but I have been able to find her on social media. She will not be hard to find.
Thank you for the support
IF my one of my daughters
IF my one of my daughters told me she was going to adopt her husbands child I would tell her DO NOT DO IT.
If one of my sons told me he wanted to adopt his wifes child I would tell him DO NOT DO IT.
Ashmar I know you mean well but, do not put yourself in a situation whereYOU will be responsibility for a living mothers child for many MANY years to come, and then some.
GoodLuck
I am old enough to understand
I am old enough to understand that I will be responsible for this child the rest of my life. I am not unaware of that. What is so wrong with want to provide a child with a healthy stable environment. Yes we do that now. It is not totally stable something happens to my DH my SS will be taken from me. The only mother he has ever known and be put with a person that is complete stranger to him, or with a relative till things are sorted out.
Do you think it is smart of us to take that risk. My cousin was adopted by his stepdad and it was the best thing that ever happened to him in his life. My Aunt adopted her stepson too. The son has had issues over the year but my aunt never disowned him.
Yes his mother is living but he literally has no idea who she is, what she looks like, or even asks about her. I want this, I love this little boy and I already take on so much responsibility for him. My DH and I have mutual account that we pay bills out of including child care, food, sporting activities just stuff. I also have him on my health insurance. I am good with my choice. I know the risks he may not want me one day, he may not view me as his mom one day. I get that.
I really hope you would not advise your children not to adopt.
Typically in order for you to
BM would have to either lose parental right or willingly give her rights up. She needs to give her consent. Simply not seeing one’s child doesn’t mean someone can just adopt them. BM could be located. It’s not that hard. Unless she is in witness protection, it’s not hard to find her. But of course it’s worth trying and you certainly need to talk to a lawyer first.