Last nights visit...
Well folks the queen biatch was at her finest again last night. Kids arrived just before I got there and so when I pulled in BM was still there saying her goodbye's. I was at the door putting my key in the lock (which she didn't know I had my own key) and she came to the door and didn't have anywhere to go, and I said "Hi" and she couldn't get by without saying anything so she looked down and mumbled a hi and then slammed the door, which I thought she was going to break! What a biatch.
Anyway had a great time with the kids, played and talked and read books, and played more games, which was just awesome and tiring 
not used to that, but I'll take it as often as I can.
So anyway while this is going on there were two phone calls and then text messages until 11PM at night!! Yup she was at her boyfriends and yet she still texted all night, plus the fact AGAIN HE GETS THEM LESS THAN 48 HOURS AND SHE'S TEXTING ALL NIGHT!!I know she's just doing it because I"m there and she hates that but come on, get a life and its bad enough that BF takes the time to respond but what about her boyfriend, doesn't he mind that she's doing this? Maybe he's a sleep, who knows. All I know is that this is completely ridiculous.
My issue is not letting this get to me, this is really where I have to be careful because I"m taking alot of this on and I can already feel myself changing and let me tell you I don't like it. I don't want to become this freaked out untrusting crazy person that is paranoid about everything she does. Hey if there's an issue with the kids or you forget something fine, call, talk to BF etc,but end it, there is no reason to carry on all night long its just plain nonsense. I need to ask BF why he kept responding to her as well, it just doesn't make any sense to me of course that will probably start a fight. Oh well thats tough this is important as far as I'm concerned....
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apd
As long as he keeps responding to every little thing she is texting, she will continue.
There is NO reason for her to be doing that!
Dawn
RE:
Maybe you could just kind of nonchalantly mention it to him so that he knows that you're not inviting discussion, just giving your opinion. Or maybe you could ask him if he'd do an experiment next time and not respond to her to see what happens. You could bring it up in a supportive and open way so he won't feel as if you're attacking him. "I can tell that her texting you all night aggravates and frustrates you, and it also takes away from your time with the kids. Maybe the next few times the kids are here we could try just ignoring her and see what she does?"
From experience I can tell you that ignoring her will cause her to get worse before she gets better, but she will eventually get the idea and back off. This woman continues to harrass you because she continually is given feedback. You just have to set your boundaries and stick to them. I'm not saying that you have to ignore everything - certainly emergencies are OK to respond to - but continuing to respond to her all night long will just reinforce to her that she has that element of control over your BF and she will not stop on her own. We've already established that this woman is in a relationship with another man and yet that's not stopping her, so I have a good idea on how rational this woman is. A few years ago BM would send me an offensive email and I'd tell her I wasn't going to respond, so she would send more emails that got nastier and nastier until I finally responded. It only takes a few times of you following through before she gets it. Now BM hardly ever emails me at all, and when she does I ignore them without telling her that I'm going to ignore them. If I told her, she'd just get worse again thinking that she'd eventually get me to respond. Responding to her is exactly what she wants him to do, because then she gets reinforcement that she has power over him.
Hopefully this helps.
*~So sayeth Nymh~*
read my other post..
Wow she is CRAZY.. I would smile and just be the kindest person ever in front of her.. It will consume her and make her miserable..
Are you and your BF not clingy but do you ever show effection in front of people.. If it were me I would have opened that door and went straight to him before she could get out the door and kiss him and say hello honey I missed you.. Or something.. Just to be a bitch..OOH I am like very horrible.. I must be in a mood.. I wish I could come in and stand in for you.. LOL>.
Happy you are not horrible...
I love your response you totally crack me up and sound like me. If I ever get the opportunity you can bet your sweet bippy that I will make sure I will do just as you say and with any luck they'll be a camera on capturing her face
....oh no whose horrible now! ...although knowing me I'll trip on my to him and fall flat on my face.....heehee!
Thank you again I'll keep up my happy front in front of her and kill her with kindness.....be the bigger person, be the bigger person...
Thank you!
I would just be yourself...
There is nothing you can do about other people's behaviour. I would just be yourself. Try not to let yourself get upset about her antics and don't stoop to her level.
APD
Thats right.. You can so be a bitch to her without coming out and saying it.. Like inviting her to the party, that will let her know that 1. you are a much BIGGER person then her 2. be a little cozy with your BF in front of her.. You will be a subtle bitch without going APO ON HER ASS.. She is a wacked out weird woman.. But that is ok its takes all kinds to make the world go round.. LOL.. I would also make sure that "you look very hott" you know not a lot of cleavage but some and some nice jeans that flatter your butt and hair done awesome and everything.. Look like a million dollars so when she leaves she will so enflamed with rage that maybe instead of you feeling this way the table will turn and she can feel this way..
Best of luck to you..
Happy...
I love that..look great - be
I love that..look great - be happy - look what I have and you don't..approach to dealing with jealous, vendictive X's. You don't have to "do" anything really...just be your own radiant, loving self..their own negative nature takes care of the rest..........