I love my SD12-1/2, but good lord I just want to shake her. She can be so stupid sometimes. Don't get me wrong, I love her to pieces, its just maybe I over-babied her and she is just way too dependent. I know, I was a really STUPID kid Myself, probably rivaling SDs stupid antics if not exceeding her, but that doesn't make me not want to shake my head and say "quit being so stupid!".

1. Turn off the sprinkler. She has done this before. She goes and shoves her face down into the running sprinkler (water in her eyes and nose, she sputters and falls and flops around in the yard) trying to unhook it from the hose completely drenching herself head to toe. The neighbor and I watch her struggle trying to unscrew it from the end of the hose for about 15 minutes (no exaggeration there). We leave her be, because really. She finally comes to the door and asks how to turn off the water hose...This is after she has been turning it ON and OFF for five weeks every day.

2. Lunch. If I don't pack it, she won't make it herself and will text all her friends how she is soo hungry and doesn't ever get to eat breakfast or lunch. She has lunch money as backup incase I can't make it or she runs behind in the morning so she can buy lunch. Nope. Bright-eyes just sits here. LOL Love my darling, but FFS really. She threw away the ice pack and the metal spoon I sent for the fruit.

3. I sent her mixed fruit, and asked if she ate any of it (she came home "starving" and NEEEDING a frozen pizza or mac n cheese two hours before dinner) and she said "uh yeah, I ate some of the apple sauce"...No my darling daughter, you did not, because there was no apple sauce. OOOOhhh she says as she reaches for a hot pocket and a bag of chips. ERM NO? You hungry, you can eat that mixed fruit rather than wasting it. She sneaks and makes herself a big fat meal after school if I am upstairs working.

3.5. If I am late getting down stairs she will eat TWO HUGE plates of dinner (equal to what DHs plate is piled up), and when I go to get my plate, you guessed it, nothing left for me. She will have poured so much sauce on her two huge mounds of spaghetti, that there will be none left for me and I get a spoon and try to scrape a tiny bit off the edge of the pan. She will get dinner everynight and I have to make her plate or she will pile it up so huge it barely stays on the plate THEN go back for more and will eat it and not leave any for us. Why? Cause if I am not regulating, DH says whatever, and she just derps around.

4. Drinking water. She had a kidney stone. She reaches for her Dad's Pepsi. NOPE. Did you drink your water "YEAH"...Did you drink all of it "Drank some of it *huff*". How much is some, darling? "*huff* dunno SOME like a few sips with LUNCH". LOL go drink a glass of water. *eyerolls*

At that point, I am like, look, until two months ago, you would not brush your teeth unless I stood there and instructed you, do you want to go there with drinking water seriously - drink the water.

5. Breakfast: She will not eat breakfast if I do not get up and make her food, even cereal. Sometimes, I don't get up, she is 13 in a month, she can pour a bowl of cereal, and I have been sick more than not for months and sometimes I have to work and type late at night to finish my work (work from home). Still, she will moan about not eating, but she is capable of making cereal, toast, and I even have poptarts (ugh) and breakfast cereal bars for her to grab and eat at the bus stop. NOPE she won't eat unless I get up and put it in her face (She WILL sneak candy for breakfast, however).

6. Brushing teeth/hygiene. She recently started doing it without direct instruction THANKGOD, but until last month, she would lie about brushing teeth to get out of it, same with showering. I had to get up and say "brush your teeth" in the morning or she'd go without and same at night. I would have to say "and wash EACH part of your body, head to toe, any skin gets washed" or she would *forget* to wash herself. She stopped washing her FACE for a week, not even in the shower. Her face was so greasy you could fry an egg. Then it was "brush your teeth, wash your body and your face, dry your hair WITH A TOWEL when you get out, pick up your dirty panties off the floor" that I had to go through the list every night. Still dealing with hangers and dirty clothes on the floor, god help me. However, she now showers every night at 8:30 after a few years of our instruction routine starting at 8:15. Hallelujah!

7. When she was 9ish, she would leave the shower curtain hanging out of the tub then ponder WHY it was broken and the water poured down the floor through the floor/ceiling down to the kitchen table and essentially destroyed the subfloor and the ceiling rotted. Just stupid stuff like that. Thankfully, I figured out it was not "broken", she was just being stupid.

Again, I love my little sneaky darling, but this crap gets old.

I hate having to monitor her every action and be so controlling, but if I don't she just flops around like a chicken with its head cut off, so to speak.

I quit reminding her of showers and teeth brushing this year. I told her if she wants to go to school smelling of BO and bad breath, she can, but when she loses friends and boys, I don't want to hear it. She argues that she doesn't smell (she does and I explain to her the amazing concept that people cannot smell themselves until they get REALLY REALLY REALLY RANK and NASTY). She didn't wash her face after that and got a face full of pimples and some teasing for being "grease face". It broke my heart, but guess what, she started showering, shaving (she would go swimming and not shave armpits unless I forced her), and even brushing her teeth! - The teeth, she would even wet the tooth brush and leave it there. She would lie and skip THREE DAYS IN A ROW NOT BRUSHING HER TEETH AT ALL. I didn't know what I was going to do with her and her freaking teeth. Finally, telling her if she gets cavities, the copay come out of HER money and making her stand away from us with dragon breath along with people gagging at school I think (it was gag worthy, seriously), she is now brushing her teeth all by her self at almost 13. I should have stopped a long time ago, but I couldn't stand to let her fall like that or ruin her teeth, ya know?

Other than those annoyances, which are of course minor and probably my fault for babying her so much (heh), she is a REALLY GOOD kid. She is empathetic, generous, kind, thoughtful, tries hard in school and always does homework (why she won't ask for help though, she cries to her friends that she needs help or will turn it in unfinished or wrong, even though every single night I ask if she has any homework problems or questions).

Anyway, I know compared to most here, I have the great life with parental authority, no BM, and a really good SD that behaves and just does normal stupid kid stuff. I'm truly grateful and do love her so much (except when I want to strangle her for leaving the damn dirty underwear on the floor in the bathroom!)

I should record some of her derpier moments and send them in and make money from Americas Funniest Home Videos!