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PigPen - who is TWELVE - stole BioHo's car

Aniki-Moderator's picture

Submitted by Aniki-Moderator on Mon, 06/15/2015 - 9:45am

I wish I was making this sh!t up...

We are sitting at home Friday, waiting for the skids usual call that BioHo is driving them to our house. 'Ho calls to say they'll be late. Why? Because PigPen has to go see a psychiatrist. WTF? PigPen gets on the phone to explain...

Tuesday night, around midnight, PigPen took the keys from BioHo's purse and stole her car. NO ONE in their house knew he was gone until 6:30am. When he called BioHo because he was lost. In MILWAUKEE!!! He was on his way to Chicago to meet some TWENTY-ONE year old girl he met on some Find Your Soulmate (?) app. Who thought he was 18. 18?! Granted the skid is 5'8". Granted he has sideburns. Granted he has such dark peach fuzz he needs to freaking shave. But this twit has the emotional maturity of a 2 year old. This 21 yo must be a freaking MORON. 5 minutes talking to the skid and you know he's immature for 12 (if it takes 5 minutes). The fact is this CHILD drove a bloody car 300 MILES without getting caught. O.M.G.

Anyhoo, per DCFS, PigPen has to see a shrink every week or the police will press charges. He believes everyone at his house hates him. This is not a surprise. PrincASS only speaks to PigPen in a snotty, disdainful tone of voice. And when DH questions who did something (while actually knowing if it was PP or PA), PrincASS always, EVERY SINGLE TIME, immediately exclaims "PigPen!!", trying to blame PP even though PrincASS when the guilty party. A few months back, 'Ho called DH all p!ssy because I didn't accept PigPen's FakeBook friend request (http://www.steptalk.org/node/214197). 'Ho asked DH "Why does SHE hate PigPen?" Since when does not accepting a friend request from a child - who is too bloody YOUNG to be on FB (and has had an account for THREE YEARS) - turn into I hate the kid? (My FB is not appropriate for a CHILD.) I may not LIKE the little shi'thead, but I bloody well don't HATE him. IMHO, that facking 'Ho is directly responsible for 1) making the skid think people hate him and 2) allowing his siblings to express hateful attitudes towards him. What kind of mother does this crap?

So what kind of weekend did we have? A Disney Dad weekend! Because DH didn't want to upset PigPen because he was upset enough to run (drive) away from home. We went to a picnic on Saturday and had some mini fireworks from PigPen about PrincASS. We didn't know anything until we were standing in line to order food and PigPen got all whiny and p!ssy. DH asked him what was wrong. Apparently, PrincASS got miffed because he wanted to stay home and play his stupid video game. DH told him that was not an option. So what did PrincASS do? Started making fun of PigPen. After DH left the room. I didn't hear what DH said to PigPen, but he told PrincASS, "Don't make fun of your brother. If I catch you doing it again, you and I will be heading out to the garage. You may be taller than I am, boy, but I'll bust your arse from here to next week." PrincASS looked like he was going to cry. GOOD.

What did Aniki do all weekend? Aniki had an affair with the bar. Friday night, I pan fried a nice steak and drank a bottle of merlot, and stayed in the basement coloring in my coloring book (Doodle Invasion: Zifflin's Coloring Book). Saturday night, at the picnic, I drank several beers. When we went home, I headed straight down to the basement for more beer and more coloring. I was actually thankful DH had to work Sunday because he took the skids home a couple hours earlier than normal. SMDH.

Comments

Aniki-Moderator's picture

Submitted by Aniki-Moderator on Mon, 06/15/2015 - 9:50am

Oh Sally, you know my DH said no such thing. He loves the skid. Sigh... PigPen did not get locked up and the police won't do anything unless PP doesn't do therapy.

Aniki-Moderator's picture

Submitted by Aniki-Moderator on Mon, 06/15/2015 - 10:18am

Ninji, the basement isn't really hiding unless I go into the laundry room. The skids come down into the basement to talk to DH when he's on the computer and PrincASS also plays on the computer. All though 'ASS hasn't actually played since I set up that motion-activated camera... }:)

Aniki-Moderator's picture

Submitted by Aniki-Moderator on Mon, 06/15/2015 - 10:28am

We close the door to the laundry room - started doing that after PrincASS came out of there one morning. Some of my things are stored in there. PrincASS has absolutely NO reason to be in there (PigPen either). Both boys are snoopy little sh!ts, so I'm willing to bet $100 PrincASS was poking around in my things.

Aniki-Moderator's picture

Submitted by Aniki-Moderator on Mon, 06/15/2015 - 11:18am

Ripley, I heart my coloring book! The doodle one is great. I got several others, but the mandalas actually make me feel stressed. I'm OCD and those things are so uniform that I feel I must color uniformly so everything matches or I'll panic!! (I'm giving those to a friend.) I've already pre-ordered the next doodle book. The coloring is FUN! For example, my only thought is "what colors do I want the balloon to be (it being the main focus in the picture)?" I've enjoyed coloring so much, I ordered some colored pencils (some of the pics have such tiny details, I'd have to sharpen my crayons every 5 strokes). Not terribly expensive ones, but if I take a big liking to pencils, I plan to save my money for a reeeeeeally nice set.

Yes. 12. 3-HUNDRED miles. To hook up with a 21 yo girl. DH (my poor daft love) said he thought PigPen figured the girl would "take care of" him. I actually snorted, then reminded him of 1) him finding pics of nekkid women on PigPen's phone 2 years ago, 2) PigPen taking condoms from the bathroom closet, opening them, and hiding them at the bottom of the trash (I found them when emptying the trash because ~DUH~ the stuff at the bottom ends up on top!) and 3) PigPen stealing BioHo's and my skivvies and bras. PigPen may have the emotional maturity of a 2 yo, but the boy has a raging curiosity for sex. :sick:

BioHo called DH Wednesday AND Thursday. However, she called while he was sleeping (he works nights) so he never heard the phone. 'Ho didn't leave him a voice mail nor did she send any texts asking him to call so he figured it was just one of her usual BS calls about nothing. Ho's excuse for not leaving a message is that she wanted PigPen to tell DH himself what he'd done. Okay, then WTF don't you leave a voice mail saying Please Call, It's Important or send a text? I know why - she's a facking IDIOT.