Looking for some help and advice

Quick facts About us:
4/5 years about now together.
-I have my bio son now 7 full custody no time spent away
-My husbands bio son now 10 we have 5 days a week
- i was told to refer to step and bio son as both mine “my boys, my kids, etc” and I listened and have as to not draw a line in our household.
- my step sons mom works out of town and my husband has a job that requires he is gone for long periods of time. Leaving me solely in charge with little to no contact with both.