Finally something amazing happened- I got another job ( another supermarket demonstrating job) . This means I don't have to work for my friend who really really likes me, lol. Yay

Guess what,in all my tears and sadness about the break up, I have a job interview tomorrow which would supply me with the perfect opportunity to pay for exSOs expenses , eg half of the rent and bills.It is awkward, I started panicking so much about finances, since I stay in quite large house with waterfront and now will be by myself and responsible for all the costs.I am running my own business which is lovely but only covered my costs so far.

Finally the whole blending attempt came to an end with me calling it off for good after 2 1/2 years .SO, or ex SO is packing his and SD 8's bags and I will stay with my kids in this house.Right now , even after all those month of struggling with the blending and SO's lack of trying to work on things- I feel totally shattered and blue.I am so sad that this rs was obviously never worth enough for him to fight for and come to a therapist with me.
I also feel like a failure because I couldn't make him happy or managed to stay happy being in the house here with SD.

I have been with SO 2 1/2 years and this morning we finally talked and the outcome may be a possible break up.
Right now I am crying and crying and feel really bad.
The last 6 month or more I withdrew from him, especially after we had some arguments where he full on screamed into my face(anger issues).He then promised HE would organise some councelling which never happened.This made me further withdraw.Allover the mini wife thing with his daughter and the fact that I could hardly speak to him without him being offended or defensive made the gap even larger.