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I had to change my phone number...

mentalmama24's picture

I decided to change my phone number because BM kept calling and texting. I blocked her but then she would use other people's phones to call and kept having the police call my phone. I guess she tried calling again and found out I changed it because she just emailed DH telling him how 'disgusting' it is that I changed my number to keep her away from SS. What does everyone else think about the situation?

mentalmama24's picture

I know that I should ignore the shit she says but I just let her get to me so bad. Ugh. DH has let her know that plenty of times but she calls and texts regardless. I am seriously considering getting an RO on her, which I've posted about asking for advice, but am not sure yet.

mentalmama24's picture

I never thought that that would be sufficient enough for an RO since she could shoot back that she isn't calling to harass ME but to talk to SS. Am I seeing this wrong???

mentalmama24's picture

I agree with you. Before DH filed for custody and before her boyfriend dumped her she would NEVER call SS. She has literally gone 3+ months without seeing him or speaking to him. But now all of a sudden she HAS to talk to him every single day, several times a day or she'll die.

twoviewpoints's picture

What does your cell phone have to do with BM communicating with SS? She doesn't need to be calling/texting you at all. If there is no land line for them to communicate on, then she can just wait until Dad is home with his phone and bug the crap out of Dad.

Even if there were a 'BM emergency' your DH's phone could be contacted with a text or voice mail while he's out of the house and/or working.

mentalmama24's picture

DH travels a lot for work and so a lot of times SS is with me, which is why she contacts me. However, due to her increasingly psycho behavior and constant threats to kick my ass I'm trying to cut off all communication with her. I've tried to let things go, ignore the stuff she says and does, and just try to get along mostly for the sake of the custody case but I just cannot do it anymore. My sanity is more important.

mentalmama24's picture

We actually have a landline but for some reason she calls my phone instead! We've tried to tell her to call at the same time but she calls consistently throughout the day at random times and then will tell us to have him call her before bed. Wth? That's not our job.

mentalmama24's picture

I guess I'm just so worried how the Judge will see everything and that's why I've been so hesitant to file charges. I've been an active participant in the court proceedings and so I had always believed that my communication with BM was factored in but everyone on this forum has told me differently. Our attorney has also said that she wasn't sure if I had grounds to file for harassment and that it makes the situation more difficult because when DH is gone I do pickups.

Rags's picture

There is no law that I am aware of requiring you to answer your phone or reply to a text. Block her number. If she needs to call SS she can do it through the house phone or be blocked from DH's phone.

Let her grumble and then use it to piss her off. I would.

CupAjoe's picture

I crossed a line yesterday and texted with SO's 13 y/o. We've been pretty careful about not giving her my number thus far so that his XW can't get it and harass me when she's on one of her rampages, but it was bound to happen out of necessity. I hope this doesn't happen. Pray for me.

mentalmama24's picture

BM emailed DH a few days ago saying it was 'disgusting' that I would change my phone number just to keep her son away from her. We followed the advice on here and had DH reply that since I am not his biological parent there is no reason for her to be contacting me at all, and that she is not to speak to me, contact me, or threaten me or harassment charges will be filed. (If you guys have seen my other posts I am really wanting to get an RO against this crazy bitch.) DH also told her that she needs to stay at her door during pickups, which both he and her previous attorney has told her dozens upon dozens of times. She replies that the only thing she ever talks to me about is how SS' day was and if I can't handle that I am no longer allowed to pick SS up and if I go on her 'property' then she is going to call the cops. The next day she called the landline to tell SS that she was going to be late (by this time she was already 30 minutes late). SS went and told me to which she replied 'You don't need to tell her anything!! Tell grandma!' (my elderly mother in law lives with us.) When she arrived to pick SS up she asked him 'Who got your hair cut! I'm supposed to do that she's not supposed to do anything for you at all since she's not your biological parent!" Dramatic much? So anyways, SS refuses to go with her, and she stands there yelling at me asking 'Are you seriously going to just sit there and not be an adult and tell him to go?' She says this again 5 more times getting louder and crazier each time to which I reply you're the mother, it isn't my fault your kids don't listen to you. Apparently it is my fault, according to her. She had her phone out filming everything and taking pictures of me and told me once she sends this to her lawyer I'd be in a lot of trouble. Apparently, this dumb bitch doesn't understand what 'Do not talk to me' and 'Stay at your door means' because of course she is still talking to me and still coming to our car. I am SO fed up. I don't know how else to make DONT TALK TO ME go through her head.

jssdallas's picture

So you have a landline where she can call and speak to her son at any time? I was going to say, depending on age of the child, to get him his own cell phone that he can use to talk with his mom and vice versa anytime so she doesn't have to go through anyone. She sounds a bit off the rocker, but I also could not imagine going through a divorce and how hard it must be to lose access/control with your children. I think if you really want the divided lines (she doesn't contact you) then maybe you should not be the one to take haircuts. that should be your husband? The filming thing is scary. Stay calm for sure in her presence! She seems like she could take it there.