ss not knowing boundaries
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My ss11 took it upon himself to go into my room into my nightstand table to get his mother's kindle. He didn't have permission to get it. Why do ssh think it's ok to go into my stuff? Why do they think they have ownership of everything? What so I so about this? He knows not to enter my room without permi permission. Do all kids think they have ownership? His mom lets him use the laptops phones kindled everything. The reason he doesn't have his own is because he breaks or loses them. This frustrates me to the max. I used to go into my mom's room but I wasn't allowed to open dressers.
SS is skeptical to go in our
SS is skeptical to go in our room even when we are in there - there is knocking rules. When we are not in there or I should say me as I will be in there more without DH, he knows better than to go in unless DH ask if we know where his hat is (he always wears a ball cap) and then SS will look in the door as that is DH's side of the room. If I ever caught him even our room beyond that point I think I would flip out, going through drawers or not.
This is a discipline matter
This is a discipline matter so if you're disengaged you tell your complaint to his mother who decides if its worth doing anything about. You can plead your case if you disagree but once the decision is made you back her up.
If mother is not going to make it clear that he is never allowed in your bedroom then you get a lock for it. Usually the standard exterior door lock will suffice and if the kid doesn't have a key to the front door you can even use the same key. Perhaps this announcement will provoke his mother to take more effective action but if not just keep it locked up.
To specifically answer your question its apparent the boy feels what is yours is ours. I don't see any problem with you going in his room and taking something you know he will quickly and dearly miss. When he complains ask him if he thinks you felt the same way when he went in your room and drawer.
Good advice. It drives me
Good advice. It drives me crazy and I pick my battles. His mom and I have different parenting styles.
Example today he wants to use her phone for histogram. She lets him use it for a couple hours. She takes it back and he begs
Until she returns it. Can I use your ph one. Love.minutes later can I.use your phone another ten minutes.can I use your.phone.
I.never give in no is no. Uhhhh just venting my night. Thanks guys.
UGH! My stepsons do that,
UGH! My stepsons do that, too! It's because they know when DH says "No," he really doesn't mean it. What it means is, "Just keep asking me until I get sick of it and I'll change my mind."
They beg him for his phone a lot, to play games on it. He'll say "No" initially. I just sigh because I know I'm going to have to listen to "Daddy, pleeeeease! Pleeeeease! Please let me borrow it for just a second! Please Daddy! Come on, pleeeease!" Good GOD. Eventually he'll go "All right, HERE!" just so they'll go the hell away and stop bothering him.
I've tried to talk to DH about this. He says he hates it when they constantly nag him for stuff, and I've tried to get him to see why they do it. They do it because it works! He keeps doing it anyway. Oh, he'll try for a day or two to be more firm with them, but it doesn't last.
My kids know that NO means NO. If you keep on asking me, all you're going to do is make me mad, and it never ends well. My stepsons know that about me, too, and they only tried to pull that shit on me a few times before they figured that out.
I still have to listen to it ad nauseam every other week from my stepsons, begging DH for this or that. Drives me NUTS.
It called "extinction bursts"
It called "extinction bursts" lol... Actual studies done on it
Why is HER kindle in YOUR
Why is HER kindle in YOUR nightstand? If she isn't going to get the point across to her son, it needs to be kept with HER stuff so he isn't rummaging through yours. I suggest the bra/underwear drawer.
Cg chick. I agree. Ss is also
Cg chick. I agree. Ss is also only child. I don't know why it gets me so annoyed but it drives me crazy.
Going in my drawer is the last straw. It was in my drawer bc it was taken away from him and I knew if it was out
He would take it. Its what I bought my wife for Christmas two years ago. I just want ssh to know that he doesn't
Get ownership of everything in the house. His mom needs to back me up on this.
I will say he apologized but right after the apology he asked to use phone.
Last night he had his mom's laptop in his room and huge thud when he dropped it off bed.
If she doesn't Cate and allows him to break her new computer she will then use mine. It floors me.
Cg chick. I agree. Ss is also
Cg chick. I agree. Ss is also only child. I don't know why it gets me so annoyed but it drives me crazy.
Going in my drawer is the last straw. It was in my drawer bc it was taken away from him and I knew if it was out
He would take it. Its what I bought my wife for Christmas two years ago. I just want ssh to know that he doesn't
Get ownership of everything in the house. His mom needs to back me up on this.
I will say he apologized but right after the apology he asked to use phone.
Last night he had his mom's laptop in his room and huge thud when he dropped it off bed.
If she doesn't Cate and allows him to break her new computer she will then use mine. It floors me.