Had to deal with ex wife TWICE this weekend!
Short version of my background. Married, currently separated for the past 3 months from DH due to adult stepsons, ex BM and lots of different friends attached to them causing all kinds of problems.
Since I have moved out I have done nothing but focus on what I need to move on. I have not contacted DH, I have not caused any problems. I have been just living my life the best I know how. I have spent most of my free time either by myself or hanging out with friends watching movies and such. Well this weekend it was a good friends birthday, so we planned a girls night out. I have not been "out" since I moved. We go to a local club to see a band play. When we get there who should be there but the ex BM. Everything went smoothly, she stayed on one side of the room, I stayed on the other. The next night this same friend invited me to go to her company's dinner. After we left the dinner we decided to go to another local club to see another band. We were there for about an hour when my friend spotted the ex BM AGAIN!! Two totally different places and they each were even located in different states. What are the odds of that? This time the exBM wasn't so nice. She had a large group of friends with her that started to try and cause me problems. They kept walking passed me calling me all kinds of horrible names. I just ignored them. They were apparently so wound up over the fact I was there that the owner of the place made the waitress cut them off drink wise because the owner was afraid that they were going to try and do something to me. After I was told about the fear that more drama might happened, we decided to leave. The owner even made sure the bouncer walked us out to car. Thank goodness I handled myself with grace and dignity.
Although, I am not going to live in fear from the exBM, SS's, DH or their attached cronies. I have a right to live my life and go where I want, I will not be bullied! And that is exactly what they are trying to do. That is what they all have been doing to me since day one of meeting DH.
So do you guys think I handle myself well? Was there something else that I should have done? What do I do if this happens again? Because I am sure it will.
Nope, you did great. Good
Nope, you did great. Good for you.
You handled yourself very
You handled yourself very classy. Good for you.
But having said that, I know you have the right to live your life and go where ever you want to, but I think if this happens again I would just leave the place.
You never know, exBM might see you at some club and she might go out into the parking lot and slash your tires. If you leave first though that can't happen.
Hopefully it won't happen again.
The slashing tires did cross
The slashing tires did cross my mind. Fortunately, I wasn't in my car. I drive a really really nice car, so I am sure if it was there more damage would have been done to it besides slashing tires. And I did see where her 450lb friend that was saying the most to me went outside at one point probably looking for my car. I don't see where exBM would actually slash my tires, but I so wouldn't put it passed her to recruit one of her buddies to do it for her. That is one thing I have learned about her over the years, she doesn't do the dirty work herself. She always comes out smelling like a rose.
My plans are to try and find other places to go to that she might not be there. Which apparently I will be limited. She is what you call a bar whore and a band groupie.
Wow, she really needs to grow
Wow, she really needs to grow up.
I think you handled yourself great.
I don't know what I would do. On one hand, you don' want her running your life and her presence dictating where you can and cannot hang out. On the other hand, what is she capable of?
Those are might thoughts
Those are might thoughts exactly. I am not sure what her or her friends are capable of. I plan on trying to find other places to go to that she might not be there. But I really didn't expect her at either of these places I went to this weekend. I ESPECIALLY didn't expect two days in a row, two different places in 2 different states!
Good for you. You handled
Good for you. You handled yourself very well and definitely showed who is the better person. She acts like she's still in high school!
What a loser! I'm sure she
What a loser! I'm sure she is aware that you and DH are no longer together so what possible issue could she have with you. She is insecure! Props to you for keeping your integrity in tact, I'm sure that just fueled her more.
Oh she is very aware that DH
Oh she is very aware that DH and I are no longer together. Shoot she was the bug in the SS's ears helping them in ruining our marriage. DH wouldn't even talk to her prior to me leaving. Now they are friends again.
I know that I fueled them all bad. Not only did they not get a reaction from me, but when they tried their crap, I simply smiled at them. Bullies hate when you don't take their bait.
I am going to try and find
I am going to try and find another place to avoid all of them. Might not be that easy because I hate to admit this, but exBM and I have very similar taste on evenings out. Maybe I should just go to church. Don't think I will have a problem there
I would have done the same
I would have done the same thing. What a brat.
Awesome job!!! You acting
Awesome job!!! You acting exactly how you should have, like a mature adult. Well done! And the BM can go make love to a cactus }:)
i'd've smiled, waved and been
i'd've smiled, waved and been obnoxiously syrupy-sweet }:)
but i'm just passive aggressive like that! i think you handled it incredibly well.
Trust me that is all the
Trust me that is all the reaction they got out of me was a smile. And both nights I acted like they weren't even there. Danced, danced danced and had a wonderful time!!! I really need time out like that, was able to let my hair down for a change. I think that did upset them even more. Plus I know she was on the phone both nights with DH telling him everything I was doing (her version as she is known to be a liar and she raised 2 liars as well). Well now if she told him I was dancing with men, she wasn't lying there }:)
^^^^ twerk it, girl!!!!
^^^^ twerk it, girl!!!!
