First and foremost, thanks to all that responded - it always helps tremendously. Yes, too much time on my hands and I focus on the negative and hyperfocus on the kidling.

The update is that I decided NOT to include SO as the middle man, and went straight to Munchkin SD12. She actually WANTS me to care and continue being concerned for her well being and health and safety. She agreed that before she leaves house with anyone, she will notify me, she simply forgot. Her moodiness and my overly sensitive nature, explains the seemingly "angry kid" - SO forgot what preteen is like, apparently! I specifically asked her, "is everything ok, are you ok? Is there something I did to upset you, because you seemed REALLY upset last night." 

She starts sobbing. My sensitive nature caught onto the fact that something bad was going on in her life, that she couldnt tell anyone. Her and her friend attend church together, and the church has organize activities frequently. She has made friends there and thought that everyone like her. So one of her new friends is "special needs", with emotions of a 3rd grader at 6th grad level (wtf? Had no idea this existed... only in the adult world, really) and when Munchkin was told of this, she said "wow really, what is your special need?" Something anyone would ask right? I guess you cant ask these days. So someone got the fweelngs hurt, and now the parent of this child gets angry and sais "my children cannot attend this church anymore because you hurt their feelings asking about their special needs". Someone needs a reality check. 

Sobbing child goes on to tell me how they lied about what she said, and now her reputation is bad, and she doesnt want to go to church anymore for a while, etc. So I comforted her and said that people will betray your trust but your real friends know what the truth is, that you are a good person and that you are a good friend. Long story short, a few days later and now the mother of this child doesnt want them to go to this church because of something about texting the pastors son...another convoluted story! Whew! The life of a preteen. I imagine this is just practice for the "real thing" - teenager years.

It ended up with SO backing off, and letting me "go with the flow" of what I think is the right thing to do, and me backing off and doing my own thing (job hunting) and Munchkin being happy that everyone likes her and has defended her repitation, and now evryone is getting along wonderfully. For now.

Also, Winona has been MIA again - Fathers day she had plans for going to movies and then got food poisoning. Im calling BS>.