You don't have to do ANYTHING that isn't in the court papers.It has been my experience in my own marriage that the non custodial parent is the one who does all the running back and forth to pick up skid and drop skid off.If she wants children for mother's day she can make arrangements to come get them and return them.
By the way her lawyer cannot make phone calls to you because it's a conflict of interest.The only thing the lawyer can do is send you a letter,email,or fax.It probably wasn't a real attorney honey so don't be intimidated

Unless it is explicit in the CO, there is no contempt. They are bullying you.

Call your lawyer and have your lawyer call hers. If it's not in the court order, you don't have to do it.

Yeah there is nothing to stop her from asking for a change of custody until your DH gets back. If that is a concern I wouldnt rock the boat. Meet her half way with her child.

It varies by family. Some SM's would simply refuse to keep a SKID when dad is away. I get that. Not all SM's are that way though. Some (inlcuding myself) do parent our SKIDS happily and are on board as a bonus parent. I think this OP is one of those parents. Then of course it would be a problem for her if her child was taken away from her on dads time. In that case my suggestion was to do as mom wanted to avoid rocking that boat. If on the other hand she would rather child be with BM while dad is gone then by all means that could easily be arranged as well.

In my family if DH is gone I would still take his time with his kids...maybe not SD14 as consistently but definitely SD5. I am not just a women living in dads house...I am there other mom and they would miss me terribly if they couldnt see me just because dad wasnt here. We are very close and bonded and it would be detrimental to them, particularly my SD5.

I guess I would ask the lawyer, how could I be in contempt for something that isn't an official legal requirement? If its not in the custody papers, its not a requirement. Makes no sense.

I never thought in my life I'd want to write my personal experience w/ my husbands ex but I have to let it out and see what other people think. Basically my husband who is now in his mid 30's got a girl pregnant when he was 21. She was on the pill (so she says) but from what we know she liked him very much and stopped taking the pills. They were not dating, but of course when your young and stupid you go threw things where you think with the wrong "head". Long story short, him being the good man he is, stepped up and said he would try to make it work. She forced him to marry her as well. He really tried here people. I mean I've heard it all from both sides and at this point I can really see what went on here. A few months after the child was born he literally could not take it. He wasnt allowed out of the house, anywhere he went was a fight and there was violence (her hitting him).We met and hit it off. He told me his problem and he really didnt think it would of been a big deal to leave her. She was out partying, dating other men which he did know about but didnt care. He had no love or emotion for her. But once she found out about him meeting me it has been HELL ever since. To this day, after so many years every week is a new issue. He pays over $1000 a month to her through court. Meanwhile, the child is in rags while she walks around with $300 outfits. I swear I have never seen her with the same clothes on twice and its been well over 10 yrs. We have the child every weekend. And NO this is not a court visitation. This goes by HER. Because all she does is go out and party. If we dare to want a weekend to ourselves she calls him a horrible father and she threatens him not to see his child anymore. It is THAT bad. We havent had kids yet because we want to do things the right way. According to my husband he was pushed into a life he didnt want at such a young age and he wants to have it the right way with me. Which is understandable. Sorry for this being so long. I am expressing years of aggrivation over this woman. It is sad how she sits there and actually believes in her head they had a loving marriage. I guess some woman want to come and go as they please, yet want to control. And I am a woman and am saying this. I see alot of things and I just don't know how to ignore it without wanting to curse her out 99% of the time. I could say more but I'd love to hear what anyone has to say. Thanks everyone